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What wrong with me?Getting engaged and planning a wedding are supposed to be the highlight of your life, right?  Yet, you are  wondering why this is so hard?  This is suppose to be the best day of your life.  You are marrying your very best friend.  You are going to surrounded by all your very best friends and family.  Yet, why is this so hard?

 Here are some of those reasons that can make planning a wedding so frustrating.  

It takes a lot of time to plan a wedding. The average wedding requires over 200 hours of planning.  You may not have the time to devote to that amount of planning.

You have a budget you have to stick to, yet you have no idea what things should cost. You have never planned a wedding before so you don’t know what things should cost so coming up with a budget can be overwhelming.

You don’t have a clue as what vendors would be the best to hire.  They all sound the same. Building those relationships takes lots of time and research to know who would be the best, most reliable and trustworthy vendor for your wedding day.

You have no experience or expertise with weddings.  You are only doing this once and it needs to be done really, really well.  That’s a lot of  pressure! You have never planned a wedding before, why would you know what to do?  Because of this, you are feeling the pressure that you have to do it all extremely well.

All you know is what your friends or maybe your cousin did on their wedding day, yet you don’t want your day to look like everyone else’s.  It can be a challenge to try to set your wedding apart or even personalize your day.  Especially, when you don’t want to do it like everyone else’s.

How are you going to keep everything flowing throughout the day when you should be enjoying the day yourself – it’s your wedding day after all! Enjoying the day is a challenge when you are also trying to run the show.  You won’t be able to be present in those moments because you will already be thinking about what’s next.

stress-free-brideYes, all those things can be hard, yet I am not going to leave you there.  Here are some solutions so you can stop being overwhelmed and relax.  These are not lofty solutions.  I want you to put these into action right now.  These things will actually help plan your wedding so you can enjoy your day like you should.  

  • Save Time

The first thing would be to buy a planner or notebook to keep yourself organized.  Next, use the resources that you already have.  For example, if you have a friend who just got married, give her a call and ask her out for coffee to discuss what she would do again or different if she could do her wedding day over again.     

  • Create a Budget

Create an accurate and realistic budget.  You really can’t afford not to.  No one wants “wedding remorse” after their wedding day!

  • Do Your Research

Make sure to compare styles of vendors, reviews, and prices. However, if you are equally interested with two very similar vendors and they both have great reviews, but one charges more money, then hire the less expensive one.  The point is… do not think that more expensive automatically equals better.  Book your vendors based on their work, their personality and how you feel about them being part of your wedding day – not solely on price.

  • Call In Assistance or Delegate

You don’t have to do this alone and shoulder all the pressures of planning a wedding day.  You have bridesmaids, groomsmen and family members who all want to help. Give them certain tasks that they are responsible for and will enjoy. For example, put your mom in charge of welcome bags and your maid of honor in charge of making sure everyone has a hair appointment. This will give you one less thing to d0.  Letting go of control will give you the freedom you desire…not the other way around.  

  • Have A Detailed Wedding Day Timeline

A wedding day timeline – what happens when, how long things last, who needs to be where.  It can all be very confusing if you have never done one before.  Yet, a well-crafted timeline creates a seamless experience for your guests (and maximizes your time with them!), helps your vendors do their best work, and cuts down on the amount of “managing” you’ll need to do on your wedding day — all very good things!  

  • Personalize Your Day

Everyone wants their wedding to be unique, memorable and meaningful. Adding personal touches and creative details will elevate your wedding from ordinary to extraordinary. How will your personalities shine through on your wedding day? How will you make your wedding ABOUT you in ways that will leave long-lasting memories for all of your guests?  It is great to find inspiration on blogs, in magazines, and on Pinterest; but remember, it’s about YOU. Your personal touch will be what makes memories for your guests to remember long past the last song.

Now is the time to take action, if you haven’t already.  Here they are in short version:

  1. Create or buy a wedding notebook or planner.
  2. Create a budget.
  3. Research your vendors.
  4. Call for assistance or delegate some wedding responsibilities.
  5. Create a wedding day timeline.
  6. Personalize your day.

wedding-day

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Marsha VanArk at Distinctly Yours Wedding & Events